The Indecisive Moment

Sitting here alone at my desk, thinking over and over again about a million and one things.

Simultaneously trying to decide on what to do for my exams, what if I failed my maths pre-exam, what if I miraculously wake motivated and refreshed on the morning of each exam and succeed and obtain over 400 points? What If I get biomedical engineering and get bored half way through September? What if its nothing that I thought it would be? What if the course is nothing but maths and few graph?

Boy oh boy! That is A LOT of  'what if's'.

At this point tonight, I cannot stop worrying and thinking about tomorrow. Remember a while back when I mentioned doing my second math pre and I was all happy, thinking perhaps, just maybe, I actually did well for once? (Find that post here)Yesterday we received a little feedback from the exams. According to our maths teacher, paper one was "atrocious". Now if your memory and my memory serves us well, I believe I thought that I did better in paper one than paper two. 

Now what the heck does that mean in relation to my exam ?

So far two of my classmates have been told that they failed. I don't want to be the third.

I've spoken to my mom about this and she said that all I need to do, is when I receive the exam, sit down with my teacher and see my good points and weak points and figure out what I need to focus on. But can that actually be done successfully, baring in mind that tomorrow is the tenth, exactly 30 days before maths paper two.

Can I dedicate more time to maths? I'm already doing 10 hours of maths class every week plus study. Although this week I've been seriously slacking on study. 

I don't know. All I know is my brainwaves are far too active for this time of night. I would love to get some sleep in and relax since I spent the entire day in Kilarney, doing the biology field trip. I feel like my entire universe is pending the maths result tomorrow. Oh and did I mention that I have an economics pre this friday? Oh the stress. I think I might convert this negative energy into some kick-ass studying energy. Start studying now - now that will get me right to sleep!

During the biology field trip, I stopped for a quick pose with my favorite net.

Pass or fail, I might just cry when given the result.

Pass or fail, I won't give up.